Where are you?

So much I wanted to say, yet can't seem to find the words...

This is not about resolutions, but 2009 was an absolute drought for me in so many ways. Since November, I have been consulting again - which of course is good - but it also means that I have about fifteen minutes of free time every day.

I have also been taking Zyban to attempt the stop smoking thing... and it has a few side effects. The major one is that I have so much more energy during the day, and manage somehow to get so much more done each hour. I don't feel weird or anything as some people have told me, it just makes me feel more ... aware.

And on Saturday night, I went out on my own to a new place - just a local kind of pub. I was sitting just having a drink, and watching soccer on the TV, when this really cute guy starts chatting to me...

Now I have also had this lack of need to get lucky for a while (since stalker chick I guess), but it was also refreshing to have some attention.

Anyway, further into the conversation, it was pretty clear he was str8 and was just looking for some conversation while he waited for his gf who was working as a waitress at an Indonesian restaurant up the road...

Okay, so many connections... the manager of the restaurant where his gf works is the first guy I kissed after my ex and I separated. I also have a picture of him embedded in my memory trying to get my cock and my friends in his mouth whole we were all very drunk and in the shower.

His gf arrived at around 11pm with Chris (another restuarant employee) and Chris's nephew... (omg I want him).

We all ended up at some out of the way country type dance club......

And Chris and I snogged in a dark alley before we left and I am still not sure why..

So back to the subject at hand.

I feel like this year is gong to be one of reawakening for me. Yes, I have no time for much at the moment because of work, but that's good in a way... I am prepaying this yr's expenses and building some fat for just in case.....

Not sure what else to say right now...... Love you all - seriously