Just some imagery...

Scenes from my little break before getting back to temporary retirement

Wellie throwing competition
Jeffery's Bay
Sunset over the Waterberg
View from the deck over the nature reserve
A walk through the forest

And the boat launch we attended

Boat

All Fun

OMG! I'm posting!

Well, I guess the reason i ever post is when I am either way up, or way down.

A little about what I do for a living...

The money part generally comes from consulting to the mining industry - I create 3D models of geological structures from clues I get from various sources including manual mapping (when geologists actually observe something and draw it on a map); drillhole data; some clever extrapolation techniques (including kriging); and a lot of intuitive guesswork based on experience.

I freelance, and work through a consultancy that is already an approved supplier to the clients I do work for. The process of becoming approved individually is long and expensive. Besides, within the framework of current racist legislation, I am too white to actually be able to be a supplier in the first place (let me not continue ranting).

Work is currently scarce, and I have been working on individual projects for one client on and off for the last two years. Through the consultancy I work through, we 'secured' a project to model a large section of the old workings of the mine which they intend re-mining using new technology. It's a project that would have taken six or seven months based on the level of detail they required. I was to head up the project from the contractors point of view, and would use two other consultants I have worked with in the past.

For six weeks, all I did was help the mine out of crisis mode on another internal project, while the other two girls (my colleagues) continued on our given task.

Out of the blue, we are called in and informed that they have had to cut costs dramatically and consequently our services would be terminated in two weeks. They would have to make use of internal resources only, and would compensate by drastically reducing the level of detail required.

During all of this and as a result of a discussion started a year ago, I interviewed for a permanent position the client had created for me. This suits me at the moment, because I will gladly trade a drop in hourly rates for guaranteed income every month ad infinitum.

At the end of the two weeks notice period, I naturally left the site, had my time sheet signed off, and billed them (for which I have been paid). I went on a two week holiday, expecting that once a formal offer had been made, I would have no chance for holidays for the next six months at least.

So on Monday, I was called to say that an offer was finalised. I went through yesterday to collect it and planned to discuss how it could best be structured to be tax effective etc.

Well, to say I was disappointed in what they are offering is the understatement of the year...

I won't be accepting it, and will quite frankly prefer to be unemployed than work as slave labour.

To give you an idea; I am currently charged out at roughly $100 per hour of which I get $70. I also bill separately for travel, and for time travelling. An average month sees me bill about $11,000, plus around $1500 for travel and stuff - which they have been paying for the last four years... Being self employed, there are many more ways to legally reduce my tax bill than being employed formally.

Their offer basically equates to $3000 per month (including all travel 'benefits') before taxes... That's not even $20 an hour!!! FFS!!

This is after I told them at the very beginning of the interview process that I would not even consider an offer less than double that...

And being a white male in this country right now basically excludes me from any formal employment at all... legally. Racism exists after apartheid. Legally. Openly. Except that because it is prejudiced against whites, it is acceptable of course.

What a waste of fucking time and resources.

Time to re-brand.

A Surreal Weekend

Thursday

I get this itch to go back on to Manhunt for a bit. It's the online 'dating' site in vogue here right now, and I have had a profile up for a while, though in general it is been a meat market, and that's not what I am after right now.

I actually stumble over two really nice profiles, and we subsequently swop a few mails, and I arrange for a drink date with each of them - one for Friday, and one for Saturday.

Friday

A really intense day at work, so I am looking forward to kicking it back with a few drinks and someone new to enjoy them with. I arrange with number one to meet at small pub just around the corner from his place, which suits me, because I needed to deliver some wedding pics I did a few weeks ago. It's a couple of gay girls, and one works as manager at the pub. Anyway, his msg's dry up late in the afternoon, and I go anyway to deliver the pics. The date never arrives. He did apologise much later, claiming car issues etc.... I doubt it though.. probably cold feet or something..

So I text Wes and meet him at our favourite al fresco cocktail spot which is a kinda annex to our favourite seafood place. We decide to enjoy the beautiful early summer evening with a few mojitos and manage to book a table inside for some good seafood fare. One of the reasons we always manage to get a table is because we kinda know the owner of the restaurant. A really decent kinda guy, Greek, a little short, around 50 I guess, but very good looking (though married, children etc)

He attaches himself to us for the evening, bringing us free drinks, chatting about the renovations he is planning, that kind of thing. We really don't mind, and enjoy his company a lot. Pretty soon though, it is very very clear that he is hitting on us both in a big way... Alcohol saturated, we all swop numbers, there is some almost inappropriate closeness haha..

Much later on, the son of a family friend bumps into us at the bar. he and the Greek owner's son play baseball together, and they were discussing the prospects for the games following day. Now David has always gotten a kick out of flirting with me, knowing full well that he is hot lol... He is around 28 or so now, but this game has been going on since his 21st or so. Supposedly str8...

He is drunk, and when he sees me, proceeds to put his arm around me, and just never let me go for the longest time, occasional hugging and picking me up.. he is strong and tall..

I was just enjoying the attention...

But the Greek guy just keeps on and on, being suggestive, touching our legs in turn, talking into our ears. Just plain surreal.

We leave as things appear to be getting a little out of hand, laughing as we walk down to the pub, and carry on for another hour....

Saturday

1am... I just getting into bed, having left Wes to go home and meeting another friend for a last beer at the pub around the corner from my house. The greek guy calls.. wants to know if I want to come back for some more drinks... I just laugh and tell him to go to bed. Apparently he repeated the exercise with Wes at about the same time.

Date number two confirms arrangements for the evening, and we decide on a meal somewhere. He suggests seafood, and not wanting to make too much of an issue, I agree, even though I seldom do fish more than twice a month. And the restaurant he chooses is not my favourite place, but there is a really cool place downstairs to go for after dinner drinks.

I rush around, having to to take house keys to my daughter who is having dinner with her bf's family on the other side of town. I am not very good at coping with being late, and don't do well waiting for others if they are late, so I am a little stressed having to drive around town as the time for meeting number two approaches fast.

As soon as I am relaxed and heading off to the restaurant, he calls and says he is going to be about half an hour late (minus 1000 pts). he sounds self pitying (minus 1000 pts) it sounds like he half wants me to cancel (-1000 pts).

So I tell him to text me when he leaves for our meeting point, not expecting a text at all.

Annoyed, I stop in at my local, and decide I am going to sit on my own in the corner, enjoy a good steak, and just do some Saturday night boy watching for a change.

Into my fourth drink, he texts and says he is on his way.... surprised, and actually pretty horny right then, I slowly finish my last drink, and think about the possibility of sex on the first date...

Even though I take my time, I am there fifteen minutes before him, and wait on the couches outside not knowing whether he would want a table that allows smoking...

There should be a law against misrepresentation. There should be at least mention of disability, A picture of the wheelchair, A warning that anything you say will be held against you as prejudice...

Deciding to just make a good meal out of it with some new conversation, I smile and we order wine and decide on food. The food arrives so quickly, I'm relieved. The sauce is gross, and the prawns overcooked, but I endure as I hear about medical stories...

Wes and I have this bad blind date rescue arrangement and I have never had to use it before...

I excuse myself to go to the loo, and promptly text Wes - 922 922!

A 911 means "accidently" arrive at the same place, be downright rude, and join the table and not leave until the date says goodbye. (I have done that three times for him)

A 922 is not as urgent, but the other party phones and you pretend it's your mother who's locked her keys in the car, or the tyre is flat and she needs some help...

SO I send the 922... Wes is with his younger brother, who after being told what 922 meant insisted on making the call to me himself.

The phone rings, and its Wes' brother number, not what I am expecting...

In the sorriest voice he can manage, he proceeds to tell me he can't stop the goldfish swimming in circles, trying everything to make me laugh or at the very least blow my cover...

And all I am saying is:" Don't worry Mom, I won't be long, just finishing up"

and trying to look concerned....

Anyway, it worked. he felt terrible about my mother (who was actually working in my sister-in-law's coffee shop kitchen while they hosted a 50th birthday...

and we paid the bill and left - but not before he touched my leg under the table and said he hope we could do something again soon... like maybe movies on Sunday.

I went over to Wes's place, and the three of us (his brother shares his apartment) share another bottle of wine...

I then go to the coffee shop to get a spare set of house keys to get into the house but arrive just at the peak of the birthday party mood... I offer to help behind the bar, and end up teaching two really really cute guys not much older than twenty or so, the proper Salvo Method Of Tequila Drinking... One day, perhaps I will show you :) Needless to say, I did many demonstrations and paid the price the following morning when I had to wake early to go bearing gifts to my daughter who turned sixteen...

Sunday

After some grocery shopping in the afternoon, I popped into my other local to see if my cousin was around, and bumped into a couple I hadn't seen in a while, and ended up in the middle of a domestic quarrel... she was just far too drunk, and was going on and on about an incident which I am not going to get into. Luckily, her lesbian friend was with, so we sat on the other side of the table, pretending to ignore them, and she has promised to introduce me to her gay brother haha!

Today was a looong day brought on by way too much over indulgence (there were more tequilas on Sunday afternoon...)

So... I am leaving the attempt at dating again for a while. The diet is actually going well, down 3 kg's despite the seemingly endless party this month. I am expecting this job offer to actually materialise in the next two days, and work is going well. Challenging as hell, but going well.

I also have an appointment with my life coach/psychologist next week. I need a 'checkup' and to discuss my career with her. She is just the most amazing woman I have ever met, and if she weren't so damn expensive, I would pay just to go and chat every couple of weeks...

(And she has a hot toyboy third husband lol who does lead glass art and is often seen shirtless heading from the workshop to the house across the lawn from the waiting rooms)

Well, that was a post long in the coming...

Sleep well blogland...

End of a dry spell

I met LL about three yrs ago through a mutual (girl) friend, Claire. He made it pretty clear that he liked me back then already, but I declined his advances for whatever reasons. I guess in the main because I am attracted to younger than what was on offer lol...

anyways, over time, we've swopped a few txts and msg's on Manhunt etc...

So last night he txts me : Come over to Claire's place for wine and nakedness later.

It was pretty cold, and I was already settled in front of the heater preparing for some soccer action.

Wes, Underwearboy and I had met earlier to go over plans for our road trip to the England game in a few days. Wes was grumpy for some reason, and it had dampened my mood. So I just thought ah fuck it, showered and headed off to Claire's place - some 20km away, armed with a bottle of wine...

Her place is really small, but she is a barrel of fun, and we stood around in the kitchen, drinking wine, then a few shooters and stuff. Eventually, LL says to Claire that he and I are going off to his place (nearby) where I was to sleep because of the alcohol consumption and driving issues.

It was all just so easy - i guess it has to do with the fact that we are both older guys with no real hangups...

It felt like a Tiger had been awoken in me. He was so in to me that it made it amazing..

I am such a weak kneed bottom with a guy with a beautiful cock and such willingness...

I guess we just didn't stop for two hours, showering together at a kind of half time at some point.

It was good to wake next to someone, especially with someone who tried so hard to make me comfortable, made me coffee.

Not sure if we will do it again shortly, but it was a great release for both of us having both been dry for too long lol...

We all need a confidence boost every now and then.

And so the boys and I are headed off to PE tomorrow night for the game. We'll drive through the night so we have some time to relax and walk along the beach. It's about 1200km, but it is a road I have traveled far too many times in my life, and it is a good road mostly. My car goes in for her service tomorrow, so all should be in top condition when we head off. We would leave earlier, but Wes has to work late.

Laterz...

Soccer fever is upon us!

So from counting down from 600 days, the madness is now fully in the swing of things! Our own team hasn't fared well, and it will take a 3-0 victory against France to stay in the game (which, judging by last night's game isn't entirely impossible).

More importantly though, we have had an influx of tourists the likes of which we haven't ever seen before, and they have brought with them a plethora of currencies to spend. Yes, prices have inflated somewhat (especially domestic flights between venues and boutique hotels), but I guess that is just the nature of a demand economy.

The hosting has been good in other ways though. Even though our roads upgrade programwas already on track, the Cup has pushed to complete many projects ahead of schedule. Unfortunately, where I live is not on a 'world cup route', so roadworks are still a major issue, whereas along major routes, all works have been suspended until everyone has left us and we can once again breathe a sigh of relief. We are really not accustomed to working this hard lol.

Another project which was pushed forward (thankfully) was the high speed rail from the Airport to Sandton (the main groove where tourists stay and wags shop). In context, it should be noted that our public transport system has been informal to say the least, let alone down right dangerous.

But, as part of a much wider project involving replacing informal 'taxis' (death traps for the poor that use them), with a really modern and reliable bus system; the highspeed rail system (dubbed The Gautrain) has been slowly taking shape.

The girls and I took the train from the Airport (close to where I live) and painlessly covered the normally one hour in traffic trip into Sandton in 14 minutes.... It seems that everyone in the the country want to taste 'normal' public transport, so while it is still in novelty stage, travelling on the weekend is a pain with queues of excited first time users.

Add to that, once we arrived in Sandton, the vibe was unbeleiavably festive, punctuated by many hot soccer boys from all over the world trying their hands (mouths) at Vuvuzela-ing...

I have been on a bit of a break in terms of my normal work for a couple of months. During this time, I have set up a studio of sorts. More of an image idea centre. There are so many creative things that can be done with ordinary photo's... so yeah, once I have kitted the place out, photo's will follow. It's a smallish space, but part of the reason for taking the space, was to set up a place to work away from home, where I seldom can be very productive..

And OMG it is fucking freezing here at the moment! We haven't seen such low temps in June for at least twenty years. Last night it dropped to -10c! That's unheard of in these parts...

Universal Truths

Life is strange sometimes, but I think the older we get, the more predictable things become. My guess is this is a function of experience, but it also has a lot to do with realizing that the more things change, the more they essentially stay the same.

I used to lie awake at night pondering the meaning of life and wondering where our next source of energy will come from. At some point I guess I realized that from my point of view, and in the bigger scheme of things, I am really just a tiny speck in the relevance of things universal.

More and more lately though, my questions have revolved more around why we as humanity are so intrinsically stoopid....

I mean seriously:

What makes a difference in religion so important?

Or a skin colour?

Why do we still have borders?

Borders have served to separate people and masses being manipulated by dictating within those borders what they are allowed to do, say, watch, think, worship, drive, learn....

The EU has shown that borders are simply a waste of time. Already, peoples have naturally drifted to where they feel comfortable, and others have stayed simply because they feel rooted to their birthplace.

In my own experience, Apartheid could only be enforced when knowledge and communication was kept away from those being oppressed. Conversely, tacit support for the system was maintained because the so called 'oppressor' portion of the population (actually just the non-oppressed), didn't really understand what it was their very own government was doing. If we had had access to the internet back then (or even international news via television), the system would have not been able to support itself for so many years. The government's own 'supporters' would have been able to see what was happening from an external point of view.

Robert Mugabe obviously doesn't know how to use Google.

And neither does Julius Malema.

Google them both.

Enter the unpronounceable Icelandic Volcano.

Observe how fragile we are when air travel (basic form of communication) is suspended by nature.

Imagine the internet being down for a week.

Imagine an onslaught on relatively defenseless satellites.

An undersea cable cut or two....

It's kinda exciting though. It has been an almost surreal experience much like watching Operation Desert Storm live on CNN.

Even though I know many people have suffered because of the travel issues, at least 200,000 (already poor and suffering) people haven't died.

It's almost amusing. And it makes life interesting from where I stand.

Away from the coast and any danger of Tsunamis.

Away from any continental faults and hence danger from earthquakes and volcanoes.

Not close enough to any polar region to experience horribly cold weather.

Not close enough to the equator to experience horribly hot weather.

All I really have to worry about is being murdered in my house.

And being hit by a meteor.

I sleep well.

later...

Hello from the East Coast (Not the one with snow)

So here I am, on the East Coast of South Africa, Durban more specifically, Umshlanga more specifically than that.

I am staying at a resort (lifestyle hotel) for the week, and tonight is my last night. Its pretty much Cancun, but just 5 hrs drive and and about one tenth of the price (excluding airfares). And good weather follows me, so despite the fact that they have had THE wettest summer in history, we had a major storm on Wednesday night, followed by a day of 28c drizzle and overcast, the weather has been amazing - 30c, 80% humidity - which spells speedo, surfers and everything that goes with it.

Anyway, a week of many things, but tonight, I was walking back to the hotel from the only Hooters franchise in SA, when I happened upon three very hot guys - one of which was taking a pee - and just became involved in a looong conversation.

kay, drunk etc, so I guess I will flesh out this post in the next few days...

Where are you?

So much I wanted to say, yet can't seem to find the words...

This is not about resolutions, but 2009 was an absolute drought for me in so many ways. Since November, I have been consulting again - which of course is good - but it also means that I have about fifteen minutes of free time every day.

I have also been taking Zyban to attempt the stop smoking thing... and it has a few side effects. The major one is that I have so much more energy during the day, and manage somehow to get so much more done each hour. I don't feel weird or anything as some people have told me, it just makes me feel more ... aware.

And on Saturday night, I went out on my own to a new place - just a local kind of pub. I was sitting just having a drink, and watching soccer on the TV, when this really cute guy starts chatting to me...

Now I have also had this lack of need to get lucky for a while (since stalker chick I guess), but it was also refreshing to have some attention.

Anyway, further into the conversation, it was pretty clear he was str8 and was just looking for some conversation while he waited for his gf who was working as a waitress at an Indonesian restaurant up the road...

Okay, so many connections... the manager of the restaurant where his gf works is the first guy I kissed after my ex and I separated. I also have a picture of him embedded in my memory trying to get my cock and my friends in his mouth whole we were all very drunk and in the shower.

His gf arrived at around 11pm with Chris (another restuarant employee) and Chris's nephew... (omg I want him).

We all ended up at some out of the way country type dance club......

And Chris and I snogged in a dark alley before we left and I am still not sure why..

So back to the subject at hand.

I feel like this year is gong to be one of reawakening for me. Yes, I have no time for much at the moment because of work, but that's good in a way... I am prepaying this yr's expenses and building some fat for just in case.....

Not sure what else to say right now...... Love you all - seriously